To All Advocates, Workers and Minions:
Effective immediately, due to your efficacious, tactical implementation of my astute and well-contrived strategies, I hereby announce a worldwide, month long vacation for all!
While I recognize that a few of you are still under probationary review for your imprudent and idiotic errors regarding your “clients,” the majority of your coworkers have fulminated, tantalized, flattered and maneuvered in such profoundly fruitful ways, I have decide to be magnanimous and include you all in this indulgent decision. To wit:
- Underdeveloped countries’ enduring sex slave trade grows in spite of all-out efforts by God believers to stop it.
- Wealthiest countries persevere to plunder the planet’s resources, burying their heads further in the sand about God’s ownership of everything.
- Massive hunger and poverty persist because a) humans still refuse to divide the plentiful resources they already have, and b) those who possess the greater wealth also believe they possess the greater intelligence.
- Corporate and political greed flourish under the self-deluded concept (and outright lie) of The More I Make, The More I Will Do For Others.
- Churches and religion continue to lie to themselves and others about God. They deny those who Jesus welcomed, protect those who abuse, and worship dogma and tradition instead of the Creator. The strategy of divide and conquer has worked amazingly well.
- Civil wars rage in still more countries with no sign of cease fire.
- More humans than ever before refute our existence even though they see our work every day: corporate greed, mass murder, rape, senseless violence, bigotry and hatred.
At this point in time, our involvement could only serve to inadvertently dismantle a bomb that is about to detonate on its own.
Upon our return, I shall meet with all Advocates to unveil a structured and focused New Blueprint. The scope of this new guide will be on a wider scale than you have ever imagined, the execution of which will require regimented oversight and cunning surveillance of your former clients. This new strategy will allow for no loopholes or makeshift methods of trickery. Our Adversary is wily and our “defense” must be aggressive; our force must be of pinpoint accuracy.
I will not now reveal the specifics of the new strategy; nor will acceptability or feasibility be discussed with workers or minions. However, I will say that it will involve three separate tiers of direct attack.
- Heavy concentration on further division of Christ’s church
- Frontal assault to engage all people groups in despondency, fear and doubt
- Unceasing public and private denunciation that our existence is a figment of undeveloped and irresponsible imaginations
Though I anticipate you will relax and enjoy this time off, as your High Commander I also expect you to return with heightened awareness and commitment, and in operation readiness. In full contemplation of our eventual goal, I cannot emphasize enough your full engagement and responsibility in this pursuit.
For those of you on probation, reviews will be conducted quickly, rigorously and without regard for family connection. You will be “earmarked” for “special duty” should you failed to pass muster.
I will see all Advocates exactly one month from today, Head Office, 7:00am, GMT.
In the meantime, relish this time to yourselves. It may be the last.
Most Assuredly Your
(This post was inspired by paulg at Just Me Being Curious)
Today’s post can also be seen at Idiot Writing at http://wp.me/p3ILHg-18U